The Challenges of Finding a Church

 The best churches I've been a part of have always been small churches, but they have also been churches where I've spent a number of years.  My first church was almost by accident– our family intended to go to another church, but they were closed when we arrived.  We reached out to another one and spoke to Ms. Oliver– a wonderful educator who I later grew to have a lot of respect for.  This church is best described as a small, traditional, black baptist church.  We sang hymns.  Church services lasted several hours.  There was Sunday school before and Fellowship time after.  At least monthly there was some kind of evening service (which of course did not mean the morning service was cancelled– we just had church all day!).  Belong to this congregation seemed to require a lot of us, but perhaps that's why my time there was so meaningful.  I fully gave myself to the growth of that church, and they to me (as I was in high school during my time there).

Finding a church almost 20 years later seems much more difficult.  Certainly, between that first church and today I have belonged to some great churches, but now with two young children– 7 and 3 years old– and a wife there are more needs to consider.  In the last two years it has become increasingly difficult due to my wife's diagnosis of lupus, which is an autoimmune disease that severely affects her stamina, among a number of other factors. It just became too much of a toll on her body to drive out to a church so far, sit through an entire service, walk around greeting people, etc.  Recently, her condition is somewhat improved, but I can't see our family being as involved as my family was growing up– and if we have less of ourselves to give to church, it seems to follow that we'll have less of a sense of connection, given my previous experiences.

Personally, I've found it challenging finding a church after going to seminary.  It took me a number of years (and counting??) to listen to sermons without being hypercritical.  Nevertheless, I have found it difficult to find a church because many pastors tailor their messages to new Christians addressing primarily felt needs.  And while there is certainly a place for that, where are the messages to help maturing Christians?  Where are the messages that focus more on expounding the bible than teaching via personal stories.  It seems many sermons today are simply spiritual motivational talks.  I want something more, for myself and my family.  I know many churches strategically emphasizes these things to reach the unchurched, but what about the training for believers to be equipped to reach the unchurched in their daily lives?  What about the chronic biblically illiteracy present among American Christians today or our inability to defend the faith?  I know there are parachurch ministries designed to address these things, but why should our people have to belong to a church and actively avail themselves of dozens of parachurch resources.  Most people do not have time for that!  Nor do they always know how to separate the wheat from the chaff, in terms of resources.  Should not the church curate this material?  Better yet, should not our churches be the training house of Christian education?  I know there are churches out there doing this, but we need more.  They should be the norm, but right now they are the exception.